(Silent Hill is awesome, sexy nurses and bitches-with-nails included. This post is in the name of fun and, whilst I do think it’s kinda hilarious that most of the enemies are bitches on heat, I don’t consider it offensive at all. Not one bit. )
So after the disgusting mini-skirt-clad nurses from Silent Hill 2 and that harlot Maria, we now have these: Screamers.
Screamers are women who waddle about after Murphy Pendleton in the latest Silent Hill game: Downpour. Having watched a playthrough I decided to pluck up the courage to play the game myself, and I have to say, I was sickened by the sexism in this vile, vile game.
(I’m actually loving it so far)
Now it’s bad enough that throughout the game we’re chased down by muscular psychos in WIFE BEATER vests, oppressed by a prison guard who looks too much like Kevin Bacon for comfort (and we’ve all seen in him Sleepers) and later bludgeoned by big bald guys, but these Screamers take the biscuit. Yeah, I know, Screamers: their only defence is to whinge and whine and have extreme PMT.
Women are nothing like that.
You first encounter one of these poor women being BEATEN by a prison inmate -who has a Village People moustache – within an inch of her life. She’s even clad in sexy heels for all the creeps who find this sort of thing a turn-on, and not only is she bloodied and confused, but her hair is in disarray and her house dress is filthy. I’m not kidding; she’s an absolute state.
Once Murphy fights off the big brute who was assaulting her, the poor lass staggers to her feet and is, understandably, dazed and confused. She teeters about on her heels, fretting over her nails, when she spots Murphy huffing and puffing with that look in his eyes. What does she do? Obviously she has to defend herself; she has no choice. She swipes with her nails and screams, screams, SCREAMS for him to back off! But what do we, the gamers – Murphy- do? We take the bitch down. With a knife -from the kitchen no less – or a very manly wrench. We can do DIY on that bitch.
Unbelievable.
I was appalled.
A while later Murphy is attacked by one of these screaming bitches from behind, and he has to violently shake her off when, out of nowhere, her gal-pals arrive and start shrieking about shoes, periods, make-up and the like. Vile, absolutely vile: here we are slaughtering them when they clearly need our help. They’re deranged, wild, and looking absolutely terrible. I can’t blame them for wanting to slap Pendleton about a bit. There isn’t a nail salon in sight.
Disgusting.
So there’s sexism on two levels here: one, all the enemies are proud wife-beaters or bimbos in disarray, and two: Murphy is pounding these bitches like bakery dough. Not to mention the high heels, the nails/claws, the terrible dye-jobs; it just gets worse and worse. This is a disgusting misrepresentation of women.
Did I mention that you encounter the first screaming biatch in the basement of a HOUSE, and the second in a KITCHEN? Where there is a FRYING PAN and a vase of FLOWERS?
I know. I know.
But then we have these other bitches:
Torn hose, pink bra on show complete with slipping strap, mini-dress, smeared mascara? Oh please.
Know what these bleach-blonde, lipstick-smeared women do? They manipulate Murphy by crying and sobbing loudly, drawing him near, when out of nowhere they spawn shadow gal-pals who prance about the place and attack Murphy when he least expects it. SOUND FAMILIAR, BOYS?
Your girlfriends are nothing like that.
So shut the fuck up, brutes.
Murphy has to get to work SMASHING -yes, they make glassy-smashy-noises like the fake mannequin bitches they are- until they die horribly. If they aren’t crying they’re giggling, making fun of Murphy, who ultimately is only out for their blood, or a look at their hooters. Not to mention their gaping, blow-up-doll mouths, practically begging for Murphy’s wrench to be plunged into their moist, quiverring bodies.
Pathetic.
I am absolutely appalled. The only “strong female” in the game is Anne Cunningham, a typical daddy’s girl whose fate, ultimately, lays in the hands of -yep, you guessed it- that bastard Murphy. Oh, she might live, yeah, and they end with a sensual and highly erotic hug. So she either dies or succumbs to Murphy’s desires; not to mention what she ends up doing with Kevin Bacon Officer Sewell at the end.
Then, finally, we have this:
Look familiar, girls?
Yeah. Looks like a giant vag, doesn’t it?
Hardly a coincidence given all the other anti-female content. This void pops up at inconvenient times to suck Pendleton in whenever he’s in sight of an escape route, which parallels rather a lot with the male view on relationships, doesn’t it? Oh, when a bitch is about to lose her maaan, what’s the last resort? Give him the vag. Bastards love vag. They can’t escape that shit, right? Right. The void-vag will ultimately swallow Pendleton up unless he can run fast enough and, like most unreliable bastard men, Pendleton knows how to RUN.
Oh yes.
I think I’ve made my point. I just wanted y’all to know that this stuff hasn’t gone unnoticed, and when the next Silent Hill game comes out, we’ll be ready. Payback time. Got it, fellas? Us bitches: we’ll be waiting. We’ll be coming at you like a buzzard.
And we won’t be laughing, or crying, or screaming about shoes.
We’ll have rolling pins.
P.S Weeping Bats? Giant tampons.
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